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I am 12 years and 24 days free of a lifetime of alcohol and alcoholic devastation with my crashing years on IV cocaine and meth with a sprinkling of various "darker" drugs, basically anything that would go through a needle. I used AA for all I could and am grateful. It made the initial bombshell difference and I still drop in occasionally.

Living in the remains of my past life of alcoholism, even though I have been able to re-establish much, has not been a life of waking up, throwing open the curtains with sunshine and birds singing. I seem to live with a baseline state that tends toward depression and withdraw.

I mescaline low-dose a couple times a month, sometimes weekly from my backyard "San Pedro" GODSEND for a gentle re-set. Once or twice a year I will use more for deeper work, most recently along the lines of self honesty, self and world forgiveness all of which is a big part of being comfortable enough in the world to get up and open the curtains.

It's the right medicine for me and could help many others, but I'm hidden about it for the most part. It puts me outside the social acceptable zone both in the "straight" world, AND in the recovery world. The relief I get from the medicine pulls me to talk and the social discomfort pushes me to reach out to the psychedelic therapy and legalities work communities.

"The Microdose" so far to me, looks like the most sensible and qualified effort to coordinate the best research and activists. I doubt that I will ever speak at conferences or get interviewed by Joe Rogan, but I wrote here to you'all and whomever may stumble on this because my little bit may not only help a sufferer out there get on the ball and start growing some cactus and if I had my miracle, some college kid out there would pick up on the big gap in mescaline research, run some tests on body chemicals and anecdotal reports from subjects to find THE DIFFERENCE between nescaline and other psychedelics. Chemically and actively it is a different animal that most don't even know exists, like the animal is in a cage in some overgrown back part of the zoo.

Legal to grow, but illegal to process with intent to produce a psychological change. It's not crashing your car that the unknowing are afraid of. A free mind causes the bound mind in another to become painfully aware of it's prison. A consensus of prisoners makes jailing the offenders the sensible thing to do, imprison the hand of grace that are reach es out to help them.

You can see I've formed an attitude. I'll forgive them all again this Sunday.

It is so good to have you all here. It's a confirmation and comfort.

=Alio

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